Showing posts with label Sunday Top Fives. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sunday Top Fives. Show all posts

Saturday, 5 February 2011

A Sunday Top Five: Things that make Libya liveable

1. Weather  - last year I scraped ice off my car on only one day, it was 4 deg. by the time I got to my office it was 8 deg, by lunchtime 20deg. That's as bad as winter gets, apart from some days of rain, it's not too bad. But from April to November it is superb 35-40 deg C, blue sky and gorgeous.

2. Palm city supermarket - This is a supermarket in a new, expensive, expat compound. Apply for a non resident  entry card and you too can enjoy shopping in a small, pricey but well stocked emporium. You find things you'll see no where else in Libya, they even have Marmite! Sometimes they have Thorntons chocolate. Last week I bought some broccoli the size of a baby's head, whilst the usual Libyan veg stalls sold tennis ball sized pieces. For that alone, they rock.

Whether going up or down, this hill is 10/10
3. Training - there's not much to do here. I don't watch tv, I tend not to socialise on weekdays. That leaves plenty of time for training. There are heaps of places to run, some superb hills to cycle on and the sea or some good open air pools for swimming. I'd prefer to run in Aberdeen, but I'd rather cycle here.

4. Expats -  there's a certain type of expat that comes and stays here. I think if you come and stay for more than 6 months then you are that type. For sure, we all like to bitch about how sh*t Libya is compared to other  countries we've worked in (and it is) but we all much prefer it to living in our home countries.

5. Gin - I could have said alcohol. But gin deserves a special mention. At an 'open bar' it is always the most popular drink. If there's Bombay Sapphire on offer, there will be a queue and a very 'dispirited' host.
Recently Person A said he was placing an order and how many bottles did  parties B,C, and Ed want ?
Answer: get what what you can and we'll divvy it up.
Person Ed got 5 bottles and will pass one to A.n.other in a reciprocal agreement.
No other adult beverage commands this level of respect, but when you're at a party, with a G&T in hand and your pinky is stuck out, elbow high. For a moment, you're not in Libya. and that's a good thing.

Bonus 6. Special mention for: Malta. If you fly from Libya to Malta it is 45 minutes, 2 beers away. If you fly from Malta to Libya it is 3 G&Ts, 2 red wines and 2 beers away. Depending on how early you check in. See a previous post on why Malta is the closest thing to haven we have.

Saturday, 29 January 2011

A Sunday Top Five: 5 Careers sadly not pursued

1. 'Glamour' photographer - as much travel and as many hot women as the other jobs, but without the risks

* I spent many hours, many very happy hours, looking at photos to put here. It's amazing what Google Images offers for 'glamour photography', especially when you set the 'safe search' option to off. I can't post anything suitable, but the results confirmed why this is #1.

2. Motorbike racer - So much cooler than F1 drivers, although spending 75% of the year in a motorhome is a bit pikey






3. Fighter pilot - I met a guy once who flew Tornadoes, I wanted to ask him, "If that's your day job, what the hell do you do for fun ?"








4. Rock guitarist - Playing like Angus Young, without looking like him




160m Down and 'Bunny Ears' is still funny


5. Commercial Saturation Diver - big money, crazy lifestyle, deep water and huge risks












** It goes without saying that being ' Mr Kylie Minogue'  isn't a recognised career.

Sunday, 23 January 2011

A Sunday Top Five : Expat Drinks in Libya

The Top Five Drinks as served by me, the bar man, at Friday night's party:

1. Gin & Tonic (Winner by a ratio of at least 3:1)
2. Mojito
3. Vodka & Cranberry juice
4. Red wine
5. Vodka & Tonic

Sunday, 16 January 2011

A Sunday Top Five: 5 Dinner Guests (Living)


1. Chrissie Wellington (MBE): Women's world record holder for Ironman racing, beats most pro male atheletes too. No ego, does alot for worthy causes, always smiles and likes beer, wine & pizza. Great speaker & alot of fun.






2. Michael Porter: The Harvard Business School professor & the godfather of competitive strategy, he's my geeky hero. If he says something, it's fact.







3. Sir Ranulph Fiennes: His autobiography, "Mad, bad & dangerous to know" sums him up. A true legend, a captivating story teller. Mad as a box of frogs and a Great Briton. I bet he drinks Gin.







4. Kylie Minogue: Because someone's got to make breakfast. 







5. Jimmy Carr: You've got to have a bit of humour at the dinner table. Ross Noble would talk too much and require too much attention. J.C can do a joke in 3 words:
"Stationary shop moves" or 2 words "Dwarf shortage". A comedy historian.

Saturday, 25 December 2010

A Sunday Top Five: Five Highlights of 2010

This time, not in ranked order :

1. Birthday in Malta: Sunshine, parents, good wine & food, a great apartment and swimming in the harbour
Lunch in Malta
2.Roc Soc World Cup: 43 deg C, enjoying cold cider, good music and dubious sporting prowess

RocSoc World Cup
3.The Malta Hash: 4 days of fun, a superbly set hash run (if I do say so myself) with 2 beer stops and more on the beach

1st Beer Stop
4.Trip To Germany: From the first beer on arrival at the airport to the last one before I boarded the flight back to Libya, I enjoyed every minute of this much needed break. And a bonus OW swim.

Homo and first beer at airport

5.A summer of cycling: There was carnage over summer as we discovered new hills and the temperature claimed its victims.Pain & suffering, happy days.

Col de Nom Yai

Sunday, 19 December 2010

A Sunday Top Five: 5 Ways Columbo will catch you

1. The phone records. Don't make a call, or say you made a call, or have someone call you or in any way rely on a phone call for an alibi. "The guys down at the phone company" will soon find you out.

2. The odometer. The extra mileage on your car exactly matches the return trip from your house to where the deceased was found.  Maybe take a longer route on the way back after topping off your victim.

3. Time. Altering people's watches to account for the missing hours you were away committing murder will always be found out. You will also give yourself away by asking people the time at a cocktail party in order to establish your alibi, especially if you've already asked 3 other people that night.

4. Relying on technology. Using any form of 'hi tech' gadgets (for the early 1970's) to establish an alibi is bound to result in a quick arrest. Forget your telephone answer machine, video tape recorder or CCTV system, they will be your downfall.

5. Leave forensic evidence. Long before CSI Where-ever came along and reduced crime solving to a test tube and a computer database, "The boys down at the lab" could match a bullet to a gun, a thread to a pullover or a hair to a head. They'd do it while the kettle boiled and wouldn't complain about people smoking in their lab.

And just one more thing....  Claiming you have 'pull' down 'at city hall' and that you'll have Columbo sacked if he doesn't stop harassing you is worse than wearing a sign round your neck with "Murderer" on it.

Saturday, 11 December 2010

Sunday, 5 December 2010

A Sunday Top Five: Best concerts

1. Mark Ronson (Glasgow 2008). I'd seen the video(see why not watch some classy music ?), so was expecting big things. He didn't have the orchestra there, but the non stop line up of guest singers & rappers to reproduce 'Version' live was just superb.
2. Moby. (Glasgow 2004). I liked Moby's music but thought we'd get a dull performance by a man behind a keyboard. I wasn't expecting a full band, 3 piece string section, awesome backing  singer and a hyperactive bald guy who likes to rock.
3.Kylie. (Glasgow 2008). The X Tour, 3 rows from the front. She could smell my sweat! So what if the show was so long that the trains had finished and everyone walked back to town ? She still talks about it.
4.Wolfsbane. (Walsall 1989). The small rock club at Junction 10. I was probably the only sober person there. A stage diver left in an ambulance. I was never the same again.
5. Dust Junkies. (Aberdeen, 1997). You goto the monthly surfer.skaters' night, you meet all the skaters from the beach and have a few beers, an unknown band comes on. The next day your whole body hurts, your clothes stink of sweat. Was I dancing ? The band release an album, it is awesome.

Honourable mention: Rocket From the Crypt (Aberdeen 1997). I've never left a gig so completely soaked through that I was actually worried about getting hypothermia if I'd had to walk home in a Scottish winter.

Sunday, 28 November 2010

A Sunday Top Five : Girls Aloud

1. Kimberley Walsh: Lovely, curvy, with an accent like freshly baked bread. But will she go all "Fern Britton" when she hits thirty? That's the worry, I have nightmares.


2.Cheryl Cole: Sexy, skinny and with such a poor track record of picking a man that even I'm in with a chance. A bit of a crier though and obviously can't cook.


3. Nadine Coyle: I'd go out with Nadine just to annoy her Hollywood Ex. but only if she agreed not to speak at all. No, seriously, I'd want that in a legally binding document.

4. Sarah Harding: She's the one you'd go down the pub with, before going home to Kimberley. The pub would need loud music. And nachos. With cheese.

5. The Ginger One: Girl not allowed.

Sunday, 21 November 2010

A Sunday Top Five: The Deca Iron Top Five

167 hours in to the Deca Ironman race in Mexico and they're well into the run section now.


NumNameCityGroupLapsDistance CompletedTimeLast LapPlace
11Christian MauditFranceMale143272,137 km Run167:29:540:21:301
13David ClampEnglandMale113215,227 km Run166:40:330:34:132
16Roger LehmanUSAMale64122,274 km Run167:26:360:26:023
12Antal VonekiHungaryMale61116,583 km Run167:35:220:21:164
10Wayne P. KurtzUSAMale4790,025 km Run167:26:280:14:145


Dave Clamp has 110 laps to go and is slowly catching  Christian Maudit who has 87 laps to complete. However Dave's had to strap up his right ankle and is suffering  a wee bit.

Saturday, 13 November 2010

A Sunday Top Five: Top 5 James Bonds

1. George Lazenby. Aside from OHMSS being my favourite Bond film, Lazenby lived the playboy Bond lifestyle. Respect for not selling out to art!

Ding Dong Moneypenny!
2. Daniel Craig. Bond a nasty b@stard? Well he is basically a government salaried hitman. Bourne would still whup him though.

3. Roger Moore. If Leslie Phillips had played Bond, this is how it'd have been.

4. Sean Connery - punch or punchline, you can't have both, ask Steven Segal.

5.Pierce Brosnan. Because there has to be 5 and it can't be Timothy Dalton and I've not seen the original Casino Royale.

Sunday, 7 November 2010

A Sunday Top Five: 5 Times I've dislocated my shoulder

  1. Falling on a half pipe on rollerblades, Aberdeen
  2. Falling on a climbing wall, Chiang Mai
  3. Falling down some steps, drill ship , Irian Jaya
  4. Jumping off a dive boat roof into the sea, Koh Samui
  5. Slipping on ice when drunk, Kazakhstan
*note: I'd not recommend Googling 'Shoulder Dislocation' if you're squeamish

Sunday, 31 October 2010

Sunday Top Five: Hardest physical challenges so far

'Tis a mere speedbump!
1. Col De Derriere - Libya, Summer 2010:  A 90km ride with a slight climb in 40 deg heat. Reality didn't match Google Earth, meaning a 30km ride back with about 1/4 of a water bottle. Me & my cycling buddy collapsed in our cars, unable to speak and only capable of sipping water without vomiting. Fun!


2. Un-named training ride - Libya, Summer 2009: A 180km solo ride on the flat, again 40 deg C. Despite over 1 litre of water per hour and taking salt tablets, I got severe cramps in both legs with 25km left to go. It was only when my boss called on my mobile that I found out my throat was so parched, I'd lost my voice. My legs were twitching all afternoon once I got home.


Knockburn Oly
3. Knockburn Olympic distance triathlon - Aberdeen, Summer 2008: 1500m swim, 40km bike but as soon as I put on my running shoes to begin the 10km run, an old injury came back and my calf exploded. The run is a hilly on/off road course. It hurt. Alot.


4. Edinburgh University Sprint Triathlon - Edinburgh, March 2008:  750m swim in the pool, then run outside in wet clothing & barefoot. It was snowing. 20km bike in the wind & snow, then a 5km run. I couldn't feel my feet at all on the run. It took a long, hot shower to recover. I love this race as a season starter.


5. Challenge Barcelona - Ironman distance triathlon, Barcelona October 2008: Amazing swim, apart from having to be lifted out of the sea as both legs cramped as I tried to stand up. But I found the 180km bike ride so dull I began to think about things like why not give Pandas alcopops to get them drunk enough to mate ? The 40km run was tough when they ran out of coke (for sugar and caffeine) and again, the run route was so boring.  This was mentally the hardest thing I've done. Yet....

Saturday, 23 October 2010

A Sunday Top Five

Top Five Bars That I Can Remember

  1. Gullivers - Bangkok : Great for people watching and a good place to start an evening
  2. B.A.T.S Bar - Jakarta : Superb margaritas and excellent Philipino covers bands 
  3. Prince Of Wales - Aberdeen: Huge selections of beers, no musak, toilets on ground floor
  4. Bull's Head - Bangkok: A taste of home in the heart of Thailand
  5. Sweet & Soul - Koh Samui: Buckets of Thai whisky & coke, pumping music and the world passing by